breathe again

I have such gratitude for however my feet and my mind have managed to come to this podcast. Post-election, I felt so incredibly off-balance. Feeling all the feelings while trying to retain some sanity and do what I needed to do as a wife and mom. Trying not to scare my husband and kids while managing a volcano of emotions.

I listened to this Podcast by Rob Bell with Pete Rollins, called Standing Firm, and for the first time in almost a week, felt the weight lift from my chest a little and my lungs expand with breath. I hope it is helpful for you as well.

one week

one week to go

The TV cameras are rolling at a frenzied clip, lawyers on each side
standing by with wet-tipped pens. We watch, delirious and dumbfounded,
as the country sways and buckles, our bearings loosened by the wear and tear
of competing narratives. And now, one week to go, with the poll numbers still
vibrating, we shift our gaze to the sky and scan for signs of reprieve.
How do you hold your breath and pray at the same time? How do you lay down
your armor and steer your heart away from the trouble? Each day offers itself
like a clean, stretched canvas, yet look how quickly we busy ourselves with the edge,
already shrinking from the finish. But this deadline’s an illusion.
Forget what time it says on the dial. We are not the frame. We are the paint.

this amazing poem was by awesome poet Maya Stein

artist decoded

artist-decoded-by-yoshinoOne of the first things that I started doing after diving into painting again was listening to this podcast, Artist Decoded by Yoshino. Those conversations kept me company as I was stepping into the vulnerability of making my marks on paper or canvas. Yoshino and the artists who were interviewed became my own little artist tribe, support community before I could make that happen in my own world. Yoshino interviews from such a relaxed and respectful place, it creates these open and authentic, extended conversations. I feel so strongly that we grow in our humanity when we listen to other people’s stories. I have found myself nodding and smiling, learning something new about the artist, about myself, in each episode.

Also as a side benefit, my instagram feed and playlists have gotten so much better just from following the artists that I really like or checking out the music that gets mentioned.

One of my favorite interviews so far has been with Blake Neubert.


I’m totally Richard Dreyfuss in this scene. Walking into my studio or when I’m talking about one of my paintings or art that excites me, I think this might be a little bit of what Brad experiences being married to an abstract artist.